So Dave and I were sitting here having a wedding budget discussion and this week’s Dancing with the Stars elimination episode came on. I’ve only ever watched one season of this trash and I honestly don’t understand why people like it. I get the appeal of shows like American Idol or So You Think You Can Dance because the people on them are actually TALENTED. And I also get the appeal of shows like Rock of Love and The Surreal Life because it’s kind of fun to see (B-list) celebrities drunk and unscripted. But I feel like Dancing with the Stars takes the worst parts of both types of shows: the bland, drama-less structure of a talent competition combined with the vapidness of no-name celebs.

Anyway, I was talking wedding with Dave when I glanced over at the t.v. and saw one of this season’s DWTS couples sitting on a couch in an office with…Dr. Drew? As in, the guy who hosted that sex show called Loveline back in the day? (Is that still on?)

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Now he has a show on VH1 called Celebrity Rehab about seriously messed up people who used to be famous and who now have drug problems. I’m slightly addicted to it (see what I did there?). But he’s not on DWTS to cure the dancers of their penchants for uppers (how would they dance otherwise?) – he’s giving RELATIONSHIP COUNSELING TO THE DANCE PARTNERS.

And – I’m not even kidding – this kid cried his friggin eyes out:

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Dude, Dancing with the Stars’ ratings must be down, because this seems like a desperate way of clawing at ratings. I feel like DWTS is a front for a season-long infomercial for semi-celebrities who are trying to revive their careers.

Good god, now they’ve got a segment on called “Anatomy of a Dancer” where they hook a bunch of electrodes up to the dancers’ bodies and then tell us how fast they can spin. And the audience is giving a standing ovation. Awesome. I’m changing the channel now.

Anyway, my whole reason for writing this is because I want to tell you which t.v. shows I watch and then I want to know which ones you watch. Here’s my list:

  • Heroes
  • How I Met Your Mother
  • Trueblood
  • Entourage
  • Gossip Girl
  • America’s Next Top Model
  • Project Runway
  • Stylista
  • Top Chef
  • Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List
  • Grey’s Anatomy
  • The Office
  • Oh my god this list is ridonkulously long
  • Top Design
  • Real Chance of Love (don’t ask why I watch that trash)
  • Celebrity Rehab (or that trash)
  • The Tudors
  • Lost
  • The Bachelor/ette

Uhhh….that’s all I can remember. Obviously these aren’t all airing new episodes right now. So I feel slightly less bad. Dave and I have a plan to watch 30 Rock from the first episode through the most recent so that we can catch up, but…based on the above, maybe I don’t need another show.

Oh, I also watch shows like The View, Oprah, Ellen, Family Guy, Jeopardy, etc…but you don’t really need to follow those to know what’s going on.

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